It is commonly said that “opposites attract and likes repel”. I believed this for a long time, especially while I was dating my former boyfriend. We were the definition of opposite. He’s extroverted. I’m introverted. He’s funny. I’m hilarious (kidding). He lives a more sedentary lifestyle. I’m very active. There was nothing wrong with being completely different. In fact, in a lot of cases it worked out; however, since moving on, I’ve gotten a new perspective on the common saying.
Jump forward to now and here I am dating basically the guy version of myself. Talk about a complete 180. Before we starting dating, I immediately picked up on some of our similarities. Although they were small things such as waking up early, going to sleep early, walking to class, studying the same subject, etc., I was still intrigued. Once we started hanging out and actually dating, I realized how many more similarities we had! We’re both really reserved around other people. We’re both not expressive with our feelings (more me). We’re both stubborn as hell (more him). We’re both slightly obsessed with working out and staying active. We both LOVE ice cream (who doesn’t?). Honestly, the list can go on for a long time. I can genuinely say I’ve never met someone more similar to me.
Obviously, we’re not the EXACT same. There are certain characteristics that make us very different. For example, I’m actually really freaking crazy and weird once you get to know me. I tend to have no filter at all. He doesn’t have a crazy side to him…which is a relief. Also, he tends to be a little more sensitive than I am, which there is nothing wrong with at all. Maybe I need to learn to be more sensitive.
So how do I like dating someone who is so similar to me? I love it. First off, I think it’s great that we have common interests; it makes finding things to do really easy. I love going to the gym with him. He’s the only person I actually like going to the gym with (besides my mom) because he pushes me to be BETTER (and I push him too I think) and he looks pretty cute working out. Besides having things to do, I feel like we kind of know how to handle each other because we’re basically just handling ourselves. We don’t force each other to talk because neither of us are talkers. I like just being able to sit in silence without feeling uncomfortable or feeling like I have to say something to break the ice. Also, I like that he’s stubborn just like me. It makes our arguments very interesting (annoying, but interesting). He really challenges the shit out of me, which is frustrating, but way better than having someone just give in and be a push-over. I guess he just really puts me in my place.
So do I think opposites attract? Yes. I think they definitely can. Do I think likes repel? Not at all. I can definitely see both sides of this argument, but I don’t think it should matter whether you’re super similar or super different. Either way you’ll have great moments together and you’ll have really shitty moments together! I believe that you can make it work.