Internal Thoughts: Jealousy

Internal Thoughts: Jealousy

Ah jealousy… the big monster that can ruin relationships and can make someone go crazy inside. Everyone has experienced jealousy in their lives. It is inevitable and it sucks. Some people are better at coping with jealousy, while other people really let it get to them. Today, I want to focus on jealousy in romantic relationships.

Jealousy

No one wants to be labeled that “jealous girlfriend” or “jealous boyfriend.” I know I definitely didn’t want that label because I think that jealousy is linked with crazy. Let me tell you though, I deserve that label because I am a jealous girlfriend… am I crazy though? Sometimes, but not always.

I think that jealousy in a relationship is stemmed from two different areas. I think it comes from insecurity, but I also think it can come from actions or experiences. Both of them are really valid reasons leading to jealousy and I think that both of them can be dealt with.

Insecurity can definitely lead to jealousy. I know that one reason why I get jealous is because I am slightly insecure about myself and my relationship in general. I mean I think I am a pretty awesome person and I think I exhibit a lot of good traits, but so do a lot of other girls. I’ve never been in a relationship prior to the one I’m in right now, so sometimes I feel like I’m not good enough or I’m not interesting enough to keep my boyfriend wanting to stay in our relationship. It can get hard sometimes when you are thinking negative or questionable thoughts about yourself, but you just have to remember that you are good enough and your significant other is lucky to be with you!

Every action or conversation in a relationship is relatively important no matter what you think. I think it is important that two people in a relationship respect each others feelings and wants and are not selfish. If there’s no respect, then the relationship is probably doomed. How does this relate to jealousy? Here’s an example. When my boyfriend and I started dating, he would still call other girls hot and what not. It mad me uncomfortable and really jealous. I’d compare myself to these other girls and I’d let it consume me. I told him I didn’t like it and he agreed to stop…respect. I think in this day and age, with social media being so prevalent, jealousy is an even bigger problem. Your significant other liking a photo of the opposite gender on Instagram can lead to jealousy. I get jealous over it, definitely. It’s hard to not compare yourself to those other people. I don’t really have a good way to deal with this yet because I still get jealous…sorry!

Lastly, I think if your significant other has previously done questionable things in the past, that can lead to jealousy. I’m going to leave it at that and dive into it deeper in a later post.

Jealousy is a bad thing…probably one of the worst things ever. In a relationship, a lot of people blame the person who is jealous, but I personally think the blame can be given to both sides, you just have to talk about it and be honest. If there’s no honesty, you’re going to remain jealous and your relationship is fucked (to put it truthfully).

~Taylor

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